Reporter
Haru, an orphaned American who washes ashore in Japan and is mistaken for the great White Ninja of legend. Raised among the finest Ninjas, Haru grows strong and big - very big. With the grace of all Three Stooges rolled into one body, Haru is an embarrassment to his clan. But when a beautiful blonde pleads for his help, Haru is given one dangerous, disastrously funny chance to prove himself.
CNN Reporter
A young half-Navajo convict dying of cancer forces a yuppie doctor to drive him to a magic healing lake.
TV Commentator
Based on the book "UFO Crash at Roswell" by Kevin Randle and Donald Schmitt, Roswell follows the attempts of Major Jesse Marcel to discover the truth about strange debris found on a local rancher's field in July of 1947. Told by his superiors that what he has found is nothing more than a downed weather balloon, Marcel maintains his military duty until the weight of the truth, however out of this world it may be, forces him to piece together what really occurred.
Cynthia Daniel
A rescue team is looking for survivors in a sinking building after a devastating earthquake.
Newswoman
The ultimate weapon, claimed to be safe for mankind, produces global side-effects including time slides and disappearances. The scientist behind the project and his car are zapped from the year 2031 to 1817 in Switzerland where he meets Dr. Victor Frankenstein, Mary Shelley and others.
A wild, zany spoof of American TV, complete with "on-the-spot" exposes, "remote" broadcasts, sensational interviews and a wide variety of commercial take-offs. Some of the topics covered in the film include "Miracle Stoves," "The Microwave De-Generation," "Death-Breath,", "Saturday Night Specials," "The Mexican Vegetable Genocide," "Sheep Tips," "Love Doll Dating Services," "Cruising for Jailbait," "Underwater Real Estate" and others. The format of the movie closely resembles that of current popular "magazine" TV shows, featuring anchorpersons in studio settings and investigative reporters "in the field."
