Candace
Frustrated that her acting career is not as challenging as her college years, Brooke Fields (portraying herself) takes a break from Hollywood by staying with distant family friends in New York City. Before her arrival, the Latin maid casually enters Jack the father's bed and sleeps with him while his oblivious wife Jeanette is in the very next room talking to him. The rich family is bankrupt and so Jeanette plans to get her son Rick married to the promising actress Brooke. She sets up a dinner but her porn actress daughter Jill is late after the family's handyman complies to practice a scene with her. When she finally arrives, Brooke already left to talk with Jeanette's niece Mark, whose mother Billie also counts on him marrying Brooke. Jeanette, who gives up on the dinner in frustration, tells the handyman to sleep with her or else get fired, only to end up firing him anyway for bad performance. But at night, it is the older Jack with whom Brooke fantasizes about sleeping.
Wealthy lingerie company owner Valerie invites several hopeful female employee prospects to a special private party. Valerie encourages all the women to share their most intimate stories on how they met their husbands as a means of acquiring a much-coveted new available position in her company.
1st Press Writer
Henri Pachard like Louis Malle is a gifted, prolific, visionary film-maker, Pachard's films idolize women, and skillfully educate the most sophisticated viewer of eroticism (both male and female) with exquisite, and mesmerizing "true to life" encounters.
Doris
Faith is a struggling cateress trying to support herself and her loser boyfriend, Al. At a social function she overhears a friendly wager offered by a socialite. The wager is $250,000 to whomever can have intimate sex with the world's top 10 male lovers within fifty days. Faith accepts the challenge, but discovers complications as she and her official "witness" spend such a long time traveling the globe together.
Second Girl in Line
The Satisfiers of Alpha Blue is set in a futuristic society which adores its sexual Satisfiers more than anything else. A space-age resort environment exists where Satisfiers and their guests raise sex to a fine art, creating a society whose entire purpose is sexual fulfillment.
Blonde in Red (segment "At the Disco")
The story involves a hectic and hilarious chase as Mrs. Leautrec (Juliet Anderson) and her dashing son Paul (Ron Jeremy) stalk three incredibly beautiful diamonds through the ballrooms and bedrooms of Europe, using love and lust as tools of their trade. Hot on the trail of the third and finest diamond, our notorious heroes find themselves at an elegant New York disco where Mrs. Leautrec meets the diamond's owner, Mr. Greenfield, while Paul strikes an unusual sexual bargain with "The Lady in Red" (Samantha Fox). Mr. Greenfield, a multi-millionaire, invites Paul and his mother to his annual masquerade and orgy. As hundreds of masked party-goers publicly pursue their favorite perversions, Paul and his mother are caught in a devious trap, causing them to lose the diamond to another thief (Veronica Hart).
Glida
A woman heads to Fire Island to recuperate after the death of her unfaithful husband.
Writer
An evil aunt abuses an orphan girl.
Joan Jaffe
An evil aunt abuses an orphan girl.
Producer
Along a lonely beach on a summer colony off the Long Island coast, a man walks slowly, reliving a summer, the summer of Laura, when he was 19. Richie has a friend on the island, Gene, who is gregarious and mischievous. Like the more sensitive Richie, he too, was 19. During that summer of awakening he loses his youthful desires and develops his manhood. On the way to the movies, Richie literally bumps into Laura, an older woman who lives nearby. She asks him if he'll help her with some chores the following day. He is totally flustered, but agrees. Richie goes to her house and after knocking on the door, and getting no response, enters. On the floor he finds a crumpled telegram which reads, "Your husband, Bob Hayes, has been killed in action." Laura appears, lonely and vulnerable. She moves toward him in a gesture of human contact. They slowly begin to dance.
Vanessa lick’s her boyfriends ass and then fucks it with a dildo while she sucks his dick in one of her wettest and sleaziest films! Vanessa Del Rio is one of the biggest and best porn starlets of all time! And this is one of her best movies! This is a classic movie that will leave you reminiscing of the good old days!
Miss Crabtree
A cinematic version of Screw magazine, featuring skits, interviews, and documentary segments.
Elizabeth Walters
Angela and Peter are siblings and have loved each other since they were kids. They are both physically attracted to each other but Peter is studying to become a priest. She finally gets in bed with him and after that Peter start to have second thoughts on his plans for the future.
Miss Muff Puff
During the course of his experiments at the Institute of Sexual Research, Dr. Charles Cherrypopper comes up with a rather interesting device... the Electro-Testicular Cock-Erector, which will cause every man in the nation to suffer an instant and unbelievable erection! The good doctor has a plan to put the device into action, and in the resulting confusion, take over the government! But, our heroine, Penelope Juiceslit, has other ideas, and sets out to stop the wicked doctor before it's too late.
Production Coordinator
Following his suicide, Buck Jones finds himself at the threshold to hell. In order to fully earn his forthcoming destiny, he pleads with guardian Ms. Tyme to grant him a reprieve. She agrees and sends him on a journey through a missed lifetime of sensual pleasures.
Writer
Following his suicide, Buck Jones finds himself at the threshold to hell. In order to fully earn his forthcoming destiny, he pleads with guardian Ms. Tyme to grant him a reprieve. She agrees and sends him on a journey through a missed lifetime of sensual pleasures.
Ms. Tyme
Following his suicide, Buck Jones finds himself at the threshold to hell. In order to fully earn his forthcoming destiny, he pleads with guardian Ms. Tyme to grant him a reprieve. She agrees and sends him on a journey through a missed lifetime of sensual pleasures.
Two horny friends come up with what they believe is a brilliant idea: they'll advertise for a live-in maid whose duties include having sex with both of them while they film it so they can make a fortune selling the footage on the porn market. Amazingly enough, they actually find someone willing to meet all their requirements, but things don't turn out exactly as planned. Written by frankfob2@yahoo.com
Mrs. Fields
An attractive but conservative mid-30's housewife stays at the house of her sexually open daughter and soon becomes involved in her daughter's swinger lifestyle.
Miss Divine
Charlatan priest Father Sexus encourages devoutly religious folks to shed their inhibitions and happily participate in assorted wild carnal activities of licentious delight.
Miss Crabtree
"To Whom It May Concern, Good Bye!!! Yours Truly, Anonymous," reads the suicide note English teacher Mr. Boynton writes and tapes to his chest. Dejected because he’s going to lose his job for moonlighting in porno flicks, he also wears Groucho Marx glasses (you know, with the big nose and fake moustache) which, somehow, is necessary apparel for someone about to jump off a New York City bridge. But before he leaps, he is rescued by a student of his named Nancy and Miss Crabtree, the Phys. Ed. teacher. As thanks for saving him, the gals go with him to "an editing room" and double-team him.
Sophie Rubenstein (uncredited)
Revived on Vol. 76 of Something Weird's Dragon Art Theatre series, this quickie defines stupid porn. It's much ado about ejaculation.