Herman owes a lot of gambling debts. To pay them off, he promises the mob he'll fix a horse, so that it does not run. He intends to trick his animal-loving cousin Virgil, an apprentice veterinarian, into helping him. Of course, he doesn't tell Virgil what he is really up to. Mistaken identities are assumed, while along the way, Virgil meets a female vet and Herman falls for the owner of the horse.
Nightclub entertainer Hap Smith has a new act since his former partner Chick Allen joined the army. With his lovely new female partner, Hap now plays a clownish parody of a soldier. When Chick organises a soldier show at Fort Benning, he realizes he needs his former partner's help—so, to get onto the base, Hap impersonates a hapless real soldier, but circumstances force them to prolong the masquerade, creating an increasingly tangled Army-sized SNAFU.
Meeting in a navy recruiting line, Al Crowthers and Melvin Jones become friends. Al has tried to enlist before, but was always rejected. He keeps trying so that he can impress women. Melvin, is allergic to women's cosmetics and his doctor prescribed ocean travel, so he decided to join the navy.
Two former nightclub partners are now enlisted in the Army. Sergeant Puccinelli ranks above his former partner, Private First Class Korwin. Puccinelli is desperately trying to get transferred from his dull job to active duty overseas. Meanwhile, all Korwin wants is a pass to see his wife and new baby.
