Ray Abrams

The third ring offers a whimsical glimpse into the future - or at least a future from the POV of the mid-20th century - with a plethora of zany postwar inventions. While none of the cartoons "of tomorrow" foresaw smartphones or DVD players, these far-fetched contraptions, gadgets, houses and farms, televisions, and various modes of transportation could only come from the madcap mind of Avery and his M-G-M crew. Uncut, restored and remastered in High Definition for the first time, Tex Avery Screwball Classics Collection Volume 3 is another must-own collection from the master of hand-drawn mayhem.

At long last a beautifully restored and mastered selection of a number of cartoon king Tex Avery’s brilliant, innovative and (most of all) hilarious MGM shorts comes to Blu-ray via the Warner Archive, with the implied promise of more volumes to come. Some of his greatest cartoons are included, and many of these shorts have likely not looked and sounded so good since their original theatrical release. This is a virtual godsend for the director’s legion of fans, and a worthwhile introduction for those yet unfamiliar with Avery’s uniquely zany oeuvre.

Smedley is fed up with Arctic weather, and wants to leave for Hawaii. But his longtime pal Chilly Willy won't let him.

Chilly tries to borrow some coal from the ski resort Smedley works at, but Smedley stops him.

As Pesky Pelican flies south for the winter, his wings begin to ice up. He's puzzled until he finds the South Pole.

At the carnival, Champ is persuaded to enter a boxing attraction with "The Australian Bounder", a fighting kangaroo. The winner receives $500.00 if he can stay 4 rounds with the animal. Doc and Champ are pleased to accept but the kangaroo and its manager don't exactly fight fair. To help Champ win, Doc comes up with a variety of schemes such as convincing the kangaroo that Champ is a mother with child, then that Champ has the measles, and, in the final round, by putting Champ on a unicycle so he can outrun his foe.

Inspector Willoughby has traced evil international jewel thief and master of disguise Vampira Hyde to the Limehouse District in London. As Big Ben chimes out the hour of 4 p.m., Willoughby realizes that it's time for tea, and he enters a tearoom. He's served by a woman whose face is familiar to him. Suddenly, Willoughby recollects that she is the woman he's been seeking. She, in turn, realizes that she's been recognized, and by means of a pill, quickly swallowed, she quickly changes into a sweet, modest, elderly woman.

Inspector Willoughby, seated on a camel trudging through the vast Sahara Desert, is on his way to return the fabulous Red-Eyed Ruby stolen from the forehead of an idol in the tomb of King Tut Tut Almond. His archenemy, notorious jewel thief Yeggs Benedict, who had previously stolen the jewel, follows Willoughby with only one thought in mind: repossession of the ruby.

A crook on a steamboat tries to outwit Inspector Willoughby.

As the scene opens, window washer Woody washes the window of Pierre's bakery. His first mishap is to cause Pierre to mess up a cake that he's decorating, and Pierre tells him off. Since this job is finished, Woody gets on a bus with his automatic extension ladder, which keeps hitting the bus driver in the head every time that the bus stops. The driver finally throws Woody off, but Woody manages to get back on. The comedy with the ladder continues, finally involving a traffic cop, a motorcycle policeman and Pierre, as well as Woody and the driver. The story ends with all the participants, on the motorcycle, crashing into a brick wall.

Woody Woodpecker has been a source of aggravating annoyance to a certain householder, due to Woody's pecking the antenna of a TV set, ...

The register of the hotel in St. Moritz is receiving its annual "dust off" in prepration for the influx of guests at the opening of the skating season.

A little papoose, bent on hunting bear, is stopped by his father, the chief, and told to forget the idea. The papoose responds by shooting a rubber-tipped arrow onto the father's nose, and the chief decides to teach his progeny a good lesson.

Dowager steps out to purchase a toy for her son. Woody Woodpecker, peering around the corner of the building, pictures a luxurious future in a home as she would have to offer, so he quickly steps out and imitates the walking toy.

A narrator tells us that in the days of the Old West, times were tough. With no law and order, bandits roamed around free to commit any crime with western outlaw.

Woody Woodpecker bothers a wealthy man who has been diagnosed as alergic to noise.

How to Stuff a Woodpecker is the 100th animated cartoon short subject in the Woody Woodpecker series. Released theatrically on May 18, 1960. Professor Strudel relates the story of how he managed to catch and stuff Woody Woodpecker... or did he? In Professor Strudel's Taxidermy Shop, there is seen a series of stuffed animals: a humming hippopotamus, a growling gorilla, a kangaroo, a half-stuffed elephant (due to lack of stuffing), and finally, Woody on a pedestal. The professor proceeds to relate how he outsmarted and captured Woody. In a forest, he hears Woody pecking away at a tree. He gets up and catches Woody, who bops the professor with a mixture of Tabasco and chili powder. With a roar, the revived professor expels the mixture, which hits a tree and reduces it to ashes. The professor then employs various ways and means to capture Woody.

Woody Woodpecker, hot, hungry and thirsty, is walking across a dry, bleak Western desert.

On a quiet and peaceful street, the serenity of one house is suddenly disturbed by the noise of Woody Woodpecker pecking away inside.

Woody tries to watch his favorite TV quiz show, "Win the Whole Wide World" despite the fact it is constantly interrupted by commercials for the stupidest products.

Doc the cat tries to catch Hickory and Dickory, to sell to NASA as laboratory mice.

The local rocket society is looking for a new volunteer to blast to the moon, the only other person having been sent there being Professor Dingledong who has not returned thus far. They decide to send mailman Woody Woodpecker who, upon landing on the moon's surface, encounters the aforementioned Dingledong who demands possession of Woody's rocket so that he may return to Earth. After many a tussle, Woody and Dingledong are both returned to Earth's atmosphere whereupon Dingledong takes revenge on the rocket society chairman by blasting *him* into space!

Bandit Denver Dooley travels to a lawless western town where he notices a sign, "No Bandits Allowed. Signed, Marshall Woody Woodpecker".

A hungry Chilly Willy notices the good food the mounties get and enrolls for the job. Unfortunately, his enrollment photo is placed over a wanted poster for criminal Caribou Lou and officer Smedley presumes Chilly is Lou and gives chase.

Robinson Gruesome, marooned on a tropical island, has had nothing to eat but bananas for 28 years. Then Chilly Willy gets marooned with him.

Two alley cats craving food decide to pull "the old raffle game". They enlist Doc to enter their raffle drawing (one) name out of a fish bowl. Being the only contestant, he naturally wins and is told his prize is a roast turkey and is given the whereabouts of the prize. Unfortunately, the turkey is in a refrigerator guarded by watchdog Cecil. Doc invents a number of ways to get past Cecil (sawing a hole around the fridge from the basement, feeding Cecil knockout drops, trying to catapult the fridge out of the kitchen), finally putting roller skates on Cecil enabling him to make off with the turkey. But he hasn't quite won yet...

Boxing bantam Pepe Chickeeto is continually bested in the boxing ring and considers retiring. Fortunately, he and his wife are expecting a son who, Pepe hopes, will carry on his great boxing legacy. He is quite disappointed when the son, Pepito by name, much prefers playing bongo drums to any kind of pugilism.

Smedley (a dog), the hottest thing on television and the star of his own I Love Smedley show, achieved his present status quite by accident.

Breezy gets into the circus for free on kids' day, but penniless Windy has to resort to guile and intrigue in order to obtain a painful entrance.

In the Antarctic Ocean, the icebreaker uss Icepick is busy clearing the sea lanes.

When a penguin escapes from the zoo, another one must be captured. Will it be Chilly Willy? Don't bet on it.

Deep in the woods, a birdwatcher is studying the various bird species found there. First, he discovers "love birds" (a henpecked husband bird and his grumbling bird spouse), and a "humming bird" (who hums rock tunes). Then he discovers Woody who gives him all sorts of trouble such as attaching his stethoscope to a running faucet, stretching the lens on his camera and then snapping it back on him, and sending all manner of trees tumbling down onto him.

Hercules, a small, bulbous-nosed plumber, receives a note saying he must "fix leak at Carnegie Hall".

In Switzerland, an underachieving rescue dog is told to go rescue someone.

Sam and Maggie are on their merry way to a costume party, and Sam is wearing a Rooster costume. They run out of gas on the way and Sam hikes off looking for a gas station.

Forest ranger Clyde is given an order to make sure the park bears are not disturbed from their winter hibernation. He inspects their cave and finds Chilly Willy trying to sleep among them. He hollers at Chilly not to wake them up, waking one bear up himself. He sends the sleepwalking bear back to bed but it isn't that simple. The bear continues to sleepwalk going on a wild ride through the woods after Chilly gets him to put some skis on. The bear finally stops... and is now sleeping in Clyde's bed. Clyde returns to the cave where all the bears are now sleepwalking and Chilly is giving each one a lit dynamite stick!

Hercules, a gardener employed at a ritzy estate lets nothing divert him from his gardening chores, and continues to perform them in the midst of a big, outdoor party being held on the grounds by the owner. Herman them blames the host for all the mistakes, mishaps and problems the guest have to endure.

The Miracle Telephone Company attempts to stop Woody Woodpecker from pecking holes in its telephone poles.

A sentry is posted to guard the food supply at a South Pole expedition location, but Chilly Willy the penguin is hungry and has his eyes on the canned sardines and other sea-food choices at the post. Lots of chase and pursuit but Willy ends up well fed.

Maggie and Sam have finally saved enough money to be able to pay off the mortgage on their home, and Maggie warns Sam to be careful on his way to the bank. Sam immediately runs into a shady character who offers many ways for Sam to lose his money, but Sam resists them all until he is offered a talking dog. San, figuring a talking dog is a way to get rich immediately buys it. He has many rejections before he can get the dog a booking at a theatre. Before the dog can exhibit his skills, a cat shows up and ruins the act. Maggie and Sam lose their home, and Sam ends up in the dog house, with a talking dog as his companion.

Smedley is the manager of Balancing Rock Canyon where various boulders are perched atop high poles. As Smedley explains, the slightest noise is enough to send the rocks tumbling ("You gotta be quieter than a goldfish in a sound-proof aquarium") so it's hardly a surprise that he panics when Chilly Willy arrives selling various loud noisemakers among them firecrackers, a "boomerang brick", a joy buzzer, novelty gun, and exploding telephone.

Smedley, manager of the "Snowtel" where Chilly Willy is visiting, notices Chilly has not paid his bill. When Chilly still refuses to pay, Smedley tries various methods of evicting him but all his attempts are thwarted either by Chilly or his own ineptitude. Eventually, the scenario culminates in Smedley chasing Chilly outside with Chilly tricking him into running into a whale's mouth.

Sam acquires and ostrich from which hatches, no surprise, an ostrich. The ostrich attach's itself to Sam, in addition to eating everything in sight, and Maggie orders him to get rid of it. When Sam thinks he has lost the bird, he returns home where Maggie leads him to the bedroom, where Sam finds the ostrich with a family of her own.

More adventures of Chilly Willy and his quest to stay warm.

A tree surgeon arrives in a forest to inspect a tree, specifically Woody's. He destroys Woody's bed with a drill and Woody plans to get even. First, he sticks a pan over said drill, then sticks his foot in the tree's branch and kicks the doctor in the face with it. He also inflates the doctor's stethoscope with a bellows until it explodes and holds up a sexy pin-up when the doctor x-rays the tree. Finally, Doc discovers Woody and gives chase but Woody inevitably outsmarts him knocking the doc unconscious. The pest gone, Woody can now continue his rest.

During a square dance, held on a dog's back, celebrating the upcoming marriage between a boy and girl flea, a city-slicker flea shows up and kidnaps the girl to the big-city. The boyfriend follows and rescues her from the villain's penthouse apartment.

A mild-mannered man whose nerves are shot from incessant noise is sent to an exclusive, silent retreat with hilarious results.

The old fishing boat captain tells the story of Chilly Willy, a singing polar bear and a bulldog who quickly falls asleep when he hears a lullaby.

While out grocery shopping, meek, middle-aged Samuel Smith and family pet Rover are run over by a speeding car. Fortunately for them, an ambulance shows up right away. Unfortunately for them, the ambulance attendant mistakenly treats Sam with dog plasma and Rover with human plasma. Both immediately recover - after which Sam starts erupting into bouts of dog-like behavior and Rover begins walking and talking like a human being, much to the consternation of the people around them, especially Sam's wife, Margaret.

Chilly Willy is freezing in his igloo home (he lives in Coldernell, Alaska) and burning everything he owns in the fireplace to keep warm

Woody Woodpecker is in the Foreign Legion, where he and his commander are guarding a dancing girl. A neighboring sheik wants her for his harem, and he kidnaps her. Woody goes to the sheik's palace and finally frees her by disguising her to be as ugly as homemade sin.

Woody's home is beset by an invasion of voracious alien termites.

An elderly, suicidal Woody Woodpecker reminisces about his life as a woodpecker, as his ability to peck wood has vanished, leaving his life seemingly without energy.

For a chance at free food at a barn dance, Woody dresses as a girl to fool ticket taker Wally Walrus.

Despite a 'No Trespassing' sign, an irritable gopher, and an obvious lack of skill, Woody is determined to play some croquet.

Uncle Tom tells the blood curdling story of how the evil Simon Legree tried to foreclose on Tom's simple log cabin. (Uncle Tom's Cabaña is a 1947 American animated short film directed by Tex Avery. The short is a parody of Uncle Tom's Cabin, and is Avery's second parody of the novel, the first being Uncle Tom's Bungalow in 1937 while at Warner Bros. Cartoons)

George and Junior get a job as dog catchers and spend the picture trying to catch one measly little dog.

George and Junior are two hungry bears who try to make a meal out of a not too bright barnyard chicken.

A hungry wolf with ham in the shape of a pig kid stands in for Santa Claus.

A murder has occurred at Gruesome Gables, and the dog detective trying to find the killer has to deal with some suspicious suspects and a haunted house.

The early worm barely escapes the bird, again. In search of a way to get rid of the bird, he enlists the help of a cat, but the bird is too smart for the cat.

Yet another variation on the Three Little Pigs theme, this time told as WW2 anti-German propaganda (the US had just entered the war), with the wolf as a thinly-disguised Hitler.

Tom is playing with Jerry when a cute lady cat is delivered to Mammy for her to take care of. Tom is smitten at first sight.

Tom's chasing Jerry when he runs right into a sleeping dog and the two of them must work together to fend him off.

Mickey is heading out on vacation from Burbank to Pomona, taking the train. The conductor, Pete, won't let him on with Pluto, so he hides Pluto in his suitcase, and tries to hide him all throughout the trip without much luck. But Pete wins when Pluto is hooked by a mail hook. Or does he?

This cartoon is by Rudy Ising, and is the last of a long line of black animal musicals done at MGM in the late 30s and early 40s.

The three little kittens have lost their mittens and are sent to bed without dinner. From their room, they see the Milky Way and sail up to it, using a basket and helium balloons, passing through some fanciful astronomical bodies, until they reach a Milky Way filled with every conceivable form of milk.

To the sound of the title song being sung by a campfire, a cow and her calf are bedding down for the night. The calf is frightened by a shadow, until it's revealed to be a jackrabbit. He follows the rabbit deep into the woods, but neither of them notices the wolf following until it's too late for the calf. The calf is trapped in a niche under some rocks, which the wolf quickly digs out. The wolf is closing in on the calf when the rabbit tries to distract him, to no avail.

Jasper is given an ultimatum by his master: break one more thing and you're out. Rodent Jerry does his best to make sure that his tormentor "gets the boot".

Barney's settling in for the winter. But water leaks, a loose shutter, a noisy fire, a teakettle left on, and some stray embers all get in the way, and Barney also locks himself out. And that's just the beginning.

Count Screwloose and J.R. the Wonder Dog are promoting a $10,000 swing contest. They plan to skip town with the entry fees, but a menacing thug from the "Citizens for Fair Play" convinces them otherwise. The contestants: A singing hippo, "Mother Goose" who starts out as an old woman, then sheds her disguise to reveal a pretty girl, and a fan-dancing ostrich. Throughout, a couple of penguins are heckling. The ostrich proves wildly popular, and Screwloose fears he'll have to give the prize to her, when he gets an idea. He dresses J.R. up as the ostrich and sends him out, but the penguins use a box of sausages to expose the dog. The crowd runs Screwloose and J.R. out, and they grab a ride on a train where the penguins are waiting for them.

The Captain and Inspector are hunting lions in Africa, though their attempts to sneak up are hampered by alarm clocks and squeaky shoes. Fortunately, there's a lion ready for them: it's the boys, dressed in a lion costume, with an "ah-ooga" horn for the roar. They're soon chasing the Captain, when their costume gets stuck and pulled off. The captain comes in to the costume after them, but the boys manage to tie him up. Before long they've run into a real (sleeping) lion. They provoke it (in costume), and get its head stuck in a hollow log. Then they go taunt the Captain again and bring him over to the log, where the lion is still stuck; he whacks it with a board and pulls it out, then tries to remove the costume when the boys walk up behind him. The inevitable chase starts slowly, then speeds into a cave.

The Captain, after much wrestling with his alarm clock, finally wakes up to discover there's no buttons (for suspenders) on his ding-busted pants. He chews out Mama; she tells him if he doesn't like the housekeeping, he can do it himself, and storms out. What follows is pretty much the usual bunch of man-keeping-house jokes: a voracious vacuum, an overflowing sink, crashing dishes, and a dozen crises at once. And still no buttons on the pants.

Mama has everyone working on spring cleaning, or so she thinks; in fact, everyone's slacking off in various ways. The Captain is the only one to get caught and face her wrath, though. To escape, he fakes illness, but the boys catch him at it. Mama calls the doctor; the boys intercept him and impersonate him. They get revealed, but so does the Captain, and Mama puts him to work doing everyone's job.

Meany, Miny and Moe, the three little monkeys are in Africa looking for ostriches so they can grab their tail feathers.

Meany, Miny, and Moe attempt to run a country store. When a telephone order comes in, hijinks ensue.

Meany, Miny & Moe goes golfing.

Meany, Miny and Moe, three monkeys, have their hearts set on a turkey dinner but the turkey thinks otherwise. While they are out hunting the turkey, the turkey sneaks into their house and gobbles up all their food. The monkeys end up eating their Thanksgiving dinner at a hot-dog stand.

Oswald the Lucky Rabbit enters a dogsled race with a $10,000 first prize.

The animals on Oswald the Rabbit's farm couldn't be happier with their work. The hens, in particular, enjoy their jobs as egg producers. True, a hen gets a bit anxious when her egg is too small or when she can't lay anything. But on the whole, times are good. That changes when a specter by the name of Depression rises from the dump and travels the globe spreading fear and panic. The Great Depression has begun and has poisoned the entire country, including Oswald's farm. Now, the roosters are listless and the chickens flop around in a daze. Oswald runs to the doctor for help. But Dr. Pill points to a poster of the President, Franklin Delano Roosevelt. "There's your doctor!" he declares. Soon, Oswald is in the White House, knocking down the Vice President in his haste to see FDR. Roosevelt sings "Confidence" and gives the rabbit a generous supply.

After reading the story of Little Red Riding Hood to three kittens in a cradle, Oswald the Rabbit goes to sleep thinking about the girl heroine. In his dream, he sees the girl pass by and decides to pick a couple of flowers for her. But the stems are impossibly long, and no matter how much he pulls, they just get longer and longer. Meanwhile, a wolf, craving the girl's basket of goodies, pulls the wool off a nearby sheep and disguises himself in it. As a bogus sheep, he asks questions of the girl. She reveals she is going to grandma's house. Soon, the wolf is at grandma's door. The old woman is so frightened, she swallows her harmonica. The wolf stores her in the icebox, promising to eat her later. By the time the girl arrives, the wolf has disguised himself as the old woman. Oswald eventually comes to the rescue. But the wolf finds a magic wand inside the basket of goodies and uses it to put Oswald on top of a construction site.

Oswald is riding on a camel; he defeats an attacking lion, using the camel's humps as cannonballs. In Cairo, he meets a queen and sings her his theme song; the sphinx and a couple pyramids join in, but the king isn't as happy.

A Oswald the Lucky Rabbit cartoon by Walter Lantz & William Nolan where Oswald do play a song with the animals in the swamp.

Late in the evening, just as a skeleton puts out its cat for the night, the masked Phantom stalks the graveyard, pausing only to insult an overly inquisitive owl. The Phantom enters the local opera house and falls in love with Kitty, a feline singer who is terribly jealous of the star of the show, a husky-voiced hippo. The Phantom falls in love with Kitty at first sight. For her sake, he sabotages the hippo (by popping and deflating her). Then he puts a phonograph player down Kitty's skirt. She walks out and pretends the recording is her own voice. Even though the record skips and, moments later, slows down to a stop (forcing the Phantom to crank the machine for her), Kitty is a hit. But does she appreciate the Phantom? No. Backstage, she jumps into the arms of Oswald the Rabbit. Enraged, the Phantom grabs Kitty and takes her down with him to the catacombs underneath the stage. Oswald goes on a rescue mission.

Three desperadoes come to Heela City to rob a bank. One of them is the tough-acting, but ultimately cowardly, Oswald the Rabbit. His two fellow bad men - a dog with an eye patch and another with a peg-leg - force him to blow up the town bank with dynamite. Oswald ends up surviving the explosion that turns the other two villains into animate skeletons. The bank is destroyed, but the safe remains. Oswald tries to open it, but turning the dial only gives him a radio broadcast. And then out of the safe pops the bulldog sheriff. The sheriff runs him out of town. Unluckily for the supposedly lucky rabbit, he comes across a wailing baby out in the desert. The baby, in a gruff voice, reveals that his father is the sheriff Oswald just escaped. Oswald is forced to return to town, not so much by his conscience as by the baby's force of will.

Three desperadoes come to Heela City to rob a bank. One of them is the tough-acting, but ultimately cowardly, Oswald the Rabbit. His two fellow bad men - a dog with an eye patch and another with a peg-leg - force him to blow up the town bank with dynamite. Oswald ends up surviving the explosion that turns the other two villains into animate skeletons. The bank is destroyed, but the safe remains. Oswald tries to open it, but turning the dial only gives him a radio broadcast. And then out of the safe pops the bulldog sheriff. The sheriff runs him out of town. Unluckily for the supposedly lucky rabbit, he comes across a wailing baby out in the desert. The baby, in a gruff voice, reveals that his father is the sheriff Oswald just escaped. Oswald is forced to return to town, not so much by his conscience as by the baby's force of will.