When Dexter Munro and his new wife Juliet get married, they decide to escape Juliet's meddling father by buying a rundown cottage and doing it up themselves. But when the cottage proves to be more ramshackle than they thought, and the scale of the repairs needed far out of their budget, the newlyweds are forced into calling on Juliet's father after all. Before long he's employed incompetent builder Josh Wicks, and the situation goes from bad to worse.
Alan Dobie plays a convict who is bequeathed a set of seven keys by a fellow prisoner. After discovering that the deceased was an embezzler who stole £20,000 that was never recovered; he sets out to find the cash after finishing the last three months of his sentence. However he must first solve the mystery of which locks the keys fit, and run the gauntlet of the police and a number of gangsters who are after him and the money.
Norman Puckle (Norman Wisdom), a well-meaning but clumsy grocer's assistant, can't seem to do anything right. After being rejected by Marlene, the love of his life, he attempts suicide, but can't even do that. He is saved from jumping off a cliff at 'Lover's Leap' by a Royal Navy petty officer. He persuades Puckle to join the Royal Navy, where he'll meet 'lots of girls'. Life in the Navy proves not to be as rosy as it's been described, and Puckle fails at every task during basic training. But despite this, he's regarded by the Admiral in charge of a rocket project to be a 'typical average British sailor', and chosen to be the first man to fly into outer space in an experimental rocket.
Norman Pitkin and Mr Grimsdale are council workmen mending the road outside an Army base when they come into conflict with the military. Shortly afterwards, they get drafted and fall into the clutches of the Sergeant they have just bested. They are sent to France to repair roads in front of the Allied advance but get captured. Pitkin takes advantage of a useful similarity to impersonate General Schreiber and manages to return a hero
At the racetrack, cleaner, Willy Joy is tricked into buying Lindy Lou, a useless greyhound, who's not too healthy either. While getting the dog back in shape, Willy crosses paths with a gang of crooks who's specialty is fixing the races with doped dogs.