A 19-year-old girl discovers she is the descendant of the Byzantine Emperor Justinian, and she learns that the emperor might have unleashed the plague on mankind and cursed his bloodline.
Aspiring actress Amelia begins her 25th birthday by breaking up with her boyfriend, and things only go downhill from there. After visiting a dubious psychic for advice, Amelia sets off on a bizarre adventure to find money for rent and possibly love.
A gang of lovely young ladies known as the Ding Dong Ditchers terrorize a sleepy suburban town by ringing peoples' doorbells and then running away. Crazed and pathetic loser Doug has just been fired from his job, so he decides to make a stand against the Ding Dong Ditchers in order to impress Claudia, who's the attractive woman who lives right across the street. However, Doug's initially minor dispute with the Ding Dong Ditchers eventually escalates into an all-out no-holds-barred war.
