Barbara Pilavin

Venerable newscaster Norm Archer reports the latest news in politics, health, culture and entertainment - such as an automotive recall of decapitation-inducing "Neckbelts" and a study finding that "depression hits losers hardest". This compilation of bogus news stories, celebrity profiles, movie trailers and skits come courtesy of the ace satirists at The Onion.

John Constantine has literally been to Hell and back. When he teams up with a policewoman to solve the mysterious suicide of her twin sister, their investigation takes them through the world of demons and angels that exists beneath the landscape of contemporary Los Angeles.

Two young girls awaken the spirit of a native from the old west whose magical powers lead to hilarious misadventures in a comedy romp the whole family will love.

Jasper James decides to leave his girlfriend and moves into a very large house with low rent but gradually discovers that his neighbor Troy has a very strange behavior.

Jane, an HIV-positive heroin addict, meets Tony, a young AIDS victim with no family, and the two form a bond.

A female cop is gunned down and wrongly accused of using excessive force in a hostage rescue attempt. Maniac cop returns from the dead once more to seek revenge, destroying everything and anyone that stands in his way.

As America's stock of athletic young men is depleted during World War II, a professional all-female baseball league springs up in the Midwest, funded by publicity-hungry candy maker Walter Harvey. Competitive sisters Dottie Hinson and Kit Keller spar with each other, scout Ernie Capadino and grumpy has-been coach Jimmy Dugan on their way to fame.

Bernie Fishbine is overweight. He stops at the neighborhood store to buy some chocolate kisses every day. This is where he meets Theresa Garabaldi. Then they take the same bus route every evening. Theresa invites Bernie to see her play piano at her father's restaurant. It is here that she gets him to join a gym. Theresa is in college and gets the idea to write about Bernie's weight problem for her thesis. She does this without telling Bernie. Meanwhile, Bernie is falling in love with Theresa, and vice versa.

A mentally disabled man gets help from a sociopath when he tries to reunite with his dying father, who years earlier disowned him.

A loner answers a simple newspaper ad and finds himself framed for murder.

A cop from Los Angeles travels to Miami to seek revenge against Cuban drug runners who killed his friend.

Cybill Shephard stars as Vicky, a woman married to a rich old man, who has one foot in the grave. Gregory Harrison plays Mike Riordon a district attorney, who is young, handsome and living at home with his Irish mom for the most. Vicky's husband Arthur gets Mike involved in a merger of two companies...or something like that even though he knows that Mike and Vicky were a couple and that she had dumped him. Whilst Mike and Vicky are attending a party, Arthur is alone at home when a burglar appears out of nowhere and shoots him point blank.

Warren Stacy, an office equipment repairman, begins murdering women after they reject his advances. To minimize the evidence, Stacy always kills while naked, wearing nothing but gloves, and further evades the law with his strong alibis. Veteran detective Leo Kessler is convinced of Stacy's guilt and begins using questionable methods to catch him.

The story involves newscaster Rodney Pointsetter (Shawn) who is so depressed between his job and his family that he tries to make a film about his life, which he intends to culminate with his own suicide. It is often interrupted with irrelevant comic sketches that an emcee claims that the audience prefers to see.

An unlikely Hollywood hooker helps a detective set a trap for a mutilator pimp.

Drama students decide to pay tribute to their favorite horror star by stealing his body from his crypt for a farewell party. They fail to realize their violation of the tomb has triggered powerful black magic, and Conrad hasn't taken his final bows yet.

A young student, haunted by the memory of a mysterious figure called Coppelius who killed his father, starts to slowly lose his mind when he encounters an emotionless woman that is actually an automata, as well as a weird salesman who actually could be the man responsible for his father's death.

Aspiring actress Eva Duarte rises from a minor celebrity to the wife of a powerful Argentine dictator, but her all consuming fiery rage, ambition, and hatred eventually become her downfall.

A young woman agonizes over whether or not to have an abortion and learns that her mother did the same 20 years prior.

The lovely Maria Teresa is unhappily married with the impotent lawyer Marcello. Maria Teresa's marriage is contrasted by the passionate Valeria, who is killed during a chase. Is Valeria's husband the murderer? Maria Teresa helps him..

The charming Adriana gets sick after her husband's death. Her brother-in-law takes her on a journey to meet a doctor, while love overwhelms them.

A man and his mistress have just taken off for a weekend romp when they're kidnapped by a trio of bank robbers. They wind up becoming media "stars" as police and reporters follow them. They all wind up at the beat-up shack of a cranky old codger, with the police surrounding them and the robbers threatening to kill everybody.

Two spouses, whose marriage is shipwrecked, recall during a last meeting, scenes and episodes of their life as a couple.

The magistrate, Scauri, inquires into the mysterious poisoning death of Gaspare Pisciotta, the imprisoned assassin of Salvatore Giuliano. He very soon finds himself struggling against a conspiracy of silence, which Scauri must therefore overcome in order to indict two powerful mafia bosses. His only hope comes for a brief moment from the testimony of the young prosecutor Lojacono. But The Organization is the most strong: the young prosecutor withdraws his deposition and the magistrate disappears in mysterious circumstances.

A student passionate about photography is betrayed by his journalist friend to whom he had given in the interesting material. Disappointed, he makes his girlfriend abort, who dies during the operation.

The love story between a free-spirited girl and a priest.

Love story between a young man and a married woman. She's married to a businessman who's neglecting her. She would like to leave him but she's afraid of the age difference between her and her lover.

In late 1930s Ferrara, Italy, the Finzi-Continis are a leading family: wealthy, aristocratic, and urbane; they are also Jewish. Their adult children, Micol and Alberto, gather a diverse circle of friends for tennis and parties at their villa with its lovely grounds, and try to keep the rest of the world at bay. But tensions between them all grow as anti-Semitism rises in Fascist Italy, and even the Finzi-Continis will have to confront the Holocaust.

The film combines actual footage of Communist leader Palmiero Togliatti's funeral with the intermingled stories of four people affected by his death: Ettore, a Venezuelan radical who abandons the wealthy Italian woman he loves to go back to his country and help his cause; Ludovico, an ailing filmmaker who finds out that art alone is not enough; Giulia, a woman who embarks upon a lesbian affair with a former mistress of her husband; and Ermanno, a philosophy graduate who breaks up with his past.

Giovanna and Franco are lovers pretending to be brother and sister in order to con unsuspecting marks while staying in the most luxurious locales throughout Europe. In their travels, they come across the beautiful Christina, a girl who is being threatened by her brother, Sergio, in order to get the family fortune. But as Giovanna and Franco delve into their story, the double-crossing begins, and no one is sure who is getting tricked.

A young student living in Rome gets a job as a tour guide and falls in love with a young stowaway who is being sought by the police.